The Complaint

"It dinna work!"
"As explained before, The Royal Apothecary Society disclaims all responsibility resulting from the use of our.."
"I did exactly as ya told me. I took two doses before, den increased my adrenalin output to de specified level via combat, den took two more doses immediately afterwards."
"..products, especially those that are deemed to be experimental by senior members of the Royal Apothecary Society. Furthermore, the Royal Apothecary Society has a policy of not offering any assurances on the validity or the feasibility of such a product. If you wish to make a complaint.."
"Look at dis! Is did yer idea of a healthy trollish ear? It's as thin as paper! A small swipe and it tore right off my head!"
".. regarding the Royal Apothecary Society, including but not limited to myself or my superiors, you may do so.."
*sigh*
"..as soon as a suitable opening is found on one of the Dark Lady's attendants' schedules. You will be informed in time of your appointment and are required to bring any evidence you may have of the alledged derelictions of duty.."
"Are ya even listening?"
"..as well as any other material that would be of use when deciding such a matter, including but not limited to malformed body parts.."
"Ya bet it's malformed!"
"..that prove that the regenerative process was interrupted in violation of our specific instructions.."
"It was just a leetle elf, nottin' to worry about."
"..by any outside influences, humanoid or bestial.."
"And had a kitty dat may have took a bite out of me.."
"..which are beyond the Royal Apotheacry Society's control. Furthermore, you are required to prove that the Royal Apothecary Society was supplied.."
"If ya could just mix up a new batch.."
"..with all requested knowledge prior to the formation of the business relationship, including but not limited to information about previously undisclosed wounds, such as.."
"We could call it even and I'd be on my way."
"..severe musculature loss on limbs which would cause the regenerative effect focus on such wounds instead of desired body parts."
*sigh* Very well. Let's forget de complaint. Could you mix up a batch dat would heal both my ears and my arm?"
"I am authorized to agree to such a request, provided that the Royal Apothecary Society is provided with adequate compensation.."
"Of course I'll pay. And I'll get anyting ya need for it."
"..as well any and all materials which currently cannot be provided by the Royal Apothecary Society without prior authorization from the Dark Lady. In addition, instructions provided by the Royal Apothecary Society must be followed without fail. The Royal Apothecary Society disclaims any responsibility from use or misuse of products whether the instructions are followed or not. To achive desired results in an inferior specimen.."
*mutter*
"..the specimen's natural blood flow must be accelerated to the highest flowspeed that such a specimen is rated for. The specimen must not be allowed to sustain any injuries during the regenerative process, for an interruption of the process could result in side effects, including but not limited to, loss of conciousness, diminished mental capacity, uncontrollable hemorrhage, paralysis, stroke and death. Clients are advised to proceed cautiously even after signs of activity have ceased on the specimen."
"Here's de payment. When will it be ready?"
"The Royal Apothecary Society has a policy of refraining to disclose any specific timetables. The clients will be informed when the requested products are available."
"I'll come back later den."
"May the Dark Lady watch over you."